Saturday, March 31, 2018
Friday, March 30, 2018
Thursday, March 29, 2018
I Know....
Nah, I don't know who I am, yet. Not sure I ever will on that. Not that it matters in the end I guess.
But what I do know is my diagnosis. I spoke with my RA doc yesterday and asked specifically what it was:
Psoriasis Arthritis - although I don't have scaly spots, I do have eczema, rosaca, skin lesions, and major marker - an immediate family member, my father. (he has/had scary scaly elbows and knees with pain etc) She is of the group that PsA (Psoriasis Arthritis) appears years earlier then skin lesions. I also have blood markers showing it and auto immune issues.
I also have Fibro, which is where my hips/low back pain is coming from, plus Mixed Connective Tissue Disorder (meaning I have some SLE - lupus but not completely etc) and finally.......MGUS. I have MGUS. That's actually a relief. I know I can be MGUS for years and years and never get further into cancer with it, or it can suddenly change. Her take is to continue to monitor every 6-8 months and as long as my results don't double/triple etc then there's not much to do about it. I can live with that knowing what it is, and not freak out.
She said too she didn't know if I needed thyroid medications. I will take less of it then.
About the Metho. I have options - not take it, take it every 2 to 4 weeks, take it twice a week 1/2 doses, or lower the dose to 6 instead of 8 - to where I get results but not major side effects. My flares aren't as bad as they have been, and she's leery on putting me on bios as they have more issues, along with major $$$$ cost. If none of the options work then maybe will look at bios next time. I still can use Prednisone when the fire is bad, and to use more Advil / more often to reduce inflammation - and pain from the Fibro.
Happy with everything. Much more clearer.
The trip was good overall. Tuesday rained, but the drive was ok. Got to Barrie and did all the shopping there, got to Poon Store too to get low carb foods (still doing that, back on April 2) and into Toronto so AJ could get to his Board meeting. I spent the evening reading in the room, had a bit of chicken/rice for dinner. Next day, AJ instructed me how to best get to the doctors - perfect drive considering it's Toronto traffic! In out, and on the road home.
Jax was super happy to see us, and nicely coiffed. Tho she has smelly shampoo for him, next time I will give her his own shampoo - hate the smell. Cats.... they were well taken care of by Michelle. Took Princess until 3 am to finally speak with me/sleep with me. Moonbeam was cool as usual. (as in, he was happy and content to see me and let me pat/ cuddle him)
Good to be home. We will go back at end of November and do the same thing - AJ's meeting, my doc appointment.
But what I do know is my diagnosis. I spoke with my RA doc yesterday and asked specifically what it was:
Psoriasis Arthritis - although I don't have scaly spots, I do have eczema, rosaca, skin lesions, and major marker - an immediate family member, my father. (he has/had scary scaly elbows and knees with pain etc) She is of the group that PsA (Psoriasis Arthritis) appears years earlier then skin lesions. I also have blood markers showing it and auto immune issues.
I also have Fibro, which is where my hips/low back pain is coming from, plus Mixed Connective Tissue Disorder (meaning I have some SLE - lupus but not completely etc) and finally.......MGUS. I have MGUS. That's actually a relief. I know I can be MGUS for years and years and never get further into cancer with it, or it can suddenly change. Her take is to continue to monitor every 6-8 months and as long as my results don't double/triple etc then there's not much to do about it. I can live with that knowing what it is, and not freak out.
She said too she didn't know if I needed thyroid medications. I will take less of it then.
About the Metho. I have options - not take it, take it every 2 to 4 weeks, take it twice a week 1/2 doses, or lower the dose to 6 instead of 8 - to where I get results but not major side effects. My flares aren't as bad as they have been, and she's leery on putting me on bios as they have more issues, along with major $$$$ cost. If none of the options work then maybe will look at bios next time. I still can use Prednisone when the fire is bad, and to use more Advil / more often to reduce inflammation - and pain from the Fibro.
Happy with everything. Much more clearer.
The trip was good overall. Tuesday rained, but the drive was ok. Got to Barrie and did all the shopping there, got to Poon Store too to get low carb foods (still doing that, back on April 2) and into Toronto so AJ could get to his Board meeting. I spent the evening reading in the room, had a bit of chicken/rice for dinner. Next day, AJ instructed me how to best get to the doctors - perfect drive considering it's Toronto traffic! In out, and on the road home.
Jax was super happy to see us, and nicely coiffed. Tho she has smelly shampoo for him, next time I will give her his own shampoo - hate the smell. Cats.... they were well taken care of by Michelle. Took Princess until 3 am to finally speak with me/sleep with me. Moonbeam was cool as usual. (as in, he was happy and content to see me and let me pat/ cuddle him)
Good to be home. We will go back at end of November and do the same thing - AJ's meeting, my doc appointment.
Sunday, March 25, 2018
Art....Artist.....
I was thinking of the art/artist statement from Jacqui. Talked with AJ about it. I've come to the conclusion that I don't think that's truly me. I mean, I understand that art and painting etc are a part of me that help me heal and express myself but as far as being a true artist - I don't see that, or feel that in me.
I thought a lot about my paintings etc and although I like them, I don't think they are art worthy. I guess in a way that doesn't matter. It's something I enjoy doing, so it's best I just continue doing it.
AJ said you like to write - maybe that's you. Ah - have you read my blog? Yes, I do have a tiny talent in writing, but that was penthouse porny stuff that I wrote 25 years ago. Besides it was only one section - lacked the rest of the story..... not that penthouse porny writings even HAD story lines.... Besides 50 shades of grey has already been done, and I'm not interested in writing that kind of stuff.
So I think the writer is sorta out of me. Just left is this wonderful, exciting blog.....
Jacqui helped, but not that much this time. It didn't propel me further, more just cleared some fizzy lines.
In the meantime I will continue to paint.
Did housecleaning today as we are going away this week. Took Jax to the dog park for a bit - he had fun. Cleaned out the car too. AJ says lets go out for dinner. Sounds fine with me. Keep the left overs for tomorrow night. Thinking Wendy's even though that's a drive into London. Wished they had a Wendy's here, have a feeling they will get one - just as we are moving. ha ha ha.
Not much more happening or inspiring at the moment.
Ta
I thought a lot about my paintings etc and although I like them, I don't think they are art worthy. I guess in a way that doesn't matter. It's something I enjoy doing, so it's best I just continue doing it.
AJ said you like to write - maybe that's you. Ah - have you read my blog? Yes, I do have a tiny talent in writing, but that was penthouse porny stuff that I wrote 25 years ago. Besides it was only one section - lacked the rest of the story..... not that penthouse porny writings even HAD story lines.... Besides 50 shades of grey has already been done, and I'm not interested in writing that kind of stuff.
So I think the writer is sorta out of me. Just left is this wonderful, exciting blog.....
Jacqui helped, but not that much this time. It didn't propel me further, more just cleared some fizzy lines.
In the meantime I will continue to paint.
Did housecleaning today as we are going away this week. Took Jax to the dog park for a bit - he had fun. Cleaned out the car too. AJ says lets go out for dinner. Sounds fine with me. Keep the left overs for tomorrow night. Thinking Wendy's even though that's a drive into London. Wished they had a Wendy's here, have a feeling they will get one - just as we are moving. ha ha ha.
Not much more happening or inspiring at the moment.
Ta
Friday, March 23, 2018
Void and Now
Yesterday's seminar was by the Diabetic Clinic. It was enjoyable, had a nice time. Mostly light and fun. Bit educational too. One of the speakers was talking about Past, Now and Future.
Interesting thing about that is in all the books I read they always talk of being in the NOW. If you think on the past, you get depressed, if you think on the future, you are aware. So it's all about the now - being in the present - noticing what is in the present etc. Her take -
You need to remember the past as what you did, but not live in your glory days. Uh, yeah - past in not my glory days, but that's besides the point. You don't only live in the future because then you don't become aware of where you are. BUT you don't live only in the now either. Because by doing that you become stuck in the now and never move towards the future.
She explained that you look back to remember what you did etc, and then turn to the future to see where you want to go, then make the plans to get there in the now. It is important to have something to focus towards, aim for so that you aren't stuck never getting or doing anything. I found that interesting and insightful. Reminds me that when I have a goal it's better and easier to live then just being in the present and not doing much.
Other then her, the rest of the day was basic. Very good singer came on and sang a few songs. Lunch was good. The vendors were interesting. I won a metal water bottle, but not just for water, can put hold stuff in too - not exactly a thermos.
Maureen...... she is kind, she picked me up, she confuses me. Her long time friend was at the seminar too sitting at another table. I said, oh we could have sat with her. I kinda thought it would have been nice to sit together as it's her friend and she might enjoy it. Maureen's response - I came with you, not her, if I wanted to sit with her, I would have come with her. OOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKK. I didn't know how to respond to that. That's nice that you thought to be with me since you came with me, but it's a crowd, I have walked around on myself, we aren't attached at the hip. I guess I can see her point in that she decided to be with me so she would stay with me - which is kind and nice. I just found it weird that we together, couldn't sit with her friend. But then, when I met her long time, since high school friend - I was glad. Didn't care for her. There was another woman at our table that I enjoyed her company - even though she talked mostly with Maureen as she was sitting beside her. Later I asked if she would like my email etc and maybe we could go for coffee. She was open to that idea and said she was trying to remember our names so she could find us on Facebook. Will see what comes from that.
Void.
Spoke with Jacqui last night. Explained I felt so empty from God. Her take was that I was in the void. As I had stated to her - I appreciate the beauty around me, recognize it, am glad for it..... I'm just at a loss of joy or thrill of it. She explained that I have become it, and not attached anymore. I am the beauty of the sunset, back yard, rocks and no longer need to feel an attachment to it to feel it. It's the void. It's actually a good thing. So now I continue to go deeper into the void and into myself and be me. Uh, who am I? Art. She said she saw art, creativity etc around me. I'm to keep being an artist to find myself. As I continue to do this that which I am will draw to me that what I need to be me. Yup. Makes sense to me. Really. I wonder though if I'm a starving artist.....doubt it. Ha ha ha! I do wonder tho what kind of artist I am. What that means. How I live that. I really can't see me selling my paintings etc as - they are nice, but I just can't see them sellable. As you can see:
Just a few of my pour paint pictures. Last one I did (not showed as I haven't taken a photo of it) I think is Sex. Can see a penis, ovaries, two animals having sex... in it. Surprised me. The first one up top with the dragonfly has two girls - depending on how you look at it, and either a hawk or God. I do enjoy making them, even if they cost me, just can't see them selling though. Then again - someone wants to buy one - I'm fine with that!
Jacqui also said I needed orange, lime green and pastel pink energy. Funny about those as she had said the last time - orange, green, pink. Guessing I'm still needing them. As much as purple is my favorite colour, since moving here, orange has become the colour I want. Will aim to make a pouring with those colours then and see what happens.
Mostly that's it. That and the thought of wanting to find purple pants, orange top, lime green runners with pastel pink laces......😊🙀
Interesting thing about that is in all the books I read they always talk of being in the NOW. If you think on the past, you get depressed, if you think on the future, you are aware. So it's all about the now - being in the present - noticing what is in the present etc. Her take -
You need to remember the past as what you did, but not live in your glory days. Uh, yeah - past in not my glory days, but that's besides the point. You don't only live in the future because then you don't become aware of where you are. BUT you don't live only in the now either. Because by doing that you become stuck in the now and never move towards the future.
She explained that you look back to remember what you did etc, and then turn to the future to see where you want to go, then make the plans to get there in the now. It is important to have something to focus towards, aim for so that you aren't stuck never getting or doing anything. I found that interesting and insightful. Reminds me that when I have a goal it's better and easier to live then just being in the present and not doing much.
Other then her, the rest of the day was basic. Very good singer came on and sang a few songs. Lunch was good. The vendors were interesting. I won a metal water bottle, but not just for water, can put hold stuff in too - not exactly a thermos.
Maureen...... she is kind, she picked me up, she confuses me. Her long time friend was at the seminar too sitting at another table. I said, oh we could have sat with her. I kinda thought it would have been nice to sit together as it's her friend and she might enjoy it. Maureen's response - I came with you, not her, if I wanted to sit with her, I would have come with her. OOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKK. I didn't know how to respond to that. That's nice that you thought to be with me since you came with me, but it's a crowd, I have walked around on myself, we aren't attached at the hip. I guess I can see her point in that she decided to be with me so she would stay with me - which is kind and nice. I just found it weird that we together, couldn't sit with her friend. But then, when I met her long time, since high school friend - I was glad. Didn't care for her. There was another woman at our table that I enjoyed her company - even though she talked mostly with Maureen as she was sitting beside her. Later I asked if she would like my email etc and maybe we could go for coffee. She was open to that idea and said she was trying to remember our names so she could find us on Facebook. Will see what comes from that.
Void.
Spoke with Jacqui last night. Explained I felt so empty from God. Her take was that I was in the void. As I had stated to her - I appreciate the beauty around me, recognize it, am glad for it..... I'm just at a loss of joy or thrill of it. She explained that I have become it, and not attached anymore. I am the beauty of the sunset, back yard, rocks and no longer need to feel an attachment to it to feel it. It's the void. It's actually a good thing. So now I continue to go deeper into the void and into myself and be me. Uh, who am I? Art. She said she saw art, creativity etc around me. I'm to keep being an artist to find myself. As I continue to do this that which I am will draw to me that what I need to be me. Yup. Makes sense to me. Really. I wonder though if I'm a starving artist.....doubt it. Ha ha ha! I do wonder tho what kind of artist I am. What that means. How I live that. I really can't see me selling my paintings etc as - they are nice, but I just can't see them sellable. As you can see:
Just a few of my pour paint pictures. Last one I did (not showed as I haven't taken a photo of it) I think is Sex. Can see a penis, ovaries, two animals having sex... in it. Surprised me. The first one up top with the dragonfly has two girls - depending on how you look at it, and either a hawk or God. I do enjoy making them, even if they cost me, just can't see them selling though. Then again - someone wants to buy one - I'm fine with that!
Jacqui also said I needed orange, lime green and pastel pink energy. Funny about those as she had said the last time - orange, green, pink. Guessing I'm still needing them. As much as purple is my favorite colour, since moving here, orange has become the colour I want. Will aim to make a pouring with those colours then and see what happens.
Mostly that's it. That and the thought of wanting to find purple pants, orange top, lime green runners with pastel pink laces......😊🙀
Wednesday, March 21, 2018
Next Day
This day is a bit better overall. And about 4 days after my Metho shot - so no surprise I'm feeling a better.....until I shoot again.
My thyroid blood test came back, still waiting for Reverse FT3. But T3 is up, and T4 is low. Meaning a maybe a bit of iron issue. That could be as I've always had some trouble with iron since my last surgery. It's wacky. Going to look at getting some iron pills then. Actually might help with the depression/sadness etc too. Maybe it's not so much the Metho then.
One of the things I thought of last night was that empty feeling I have. Think that has to do with the missing God part. Use to help but now since God is gone - it's just empty and I feel it.
Talked with AJ about a new car (SUV) and travelling today. He said if we took the money from his RRSP - that would leave us, him, with about 3 years of living money - for the day to day things that he has to take money out for. Well that's not comfortable for me. As it is his RRSP is going to last us about 6 years. Then for us to have comfortable money - as in making it day to day like now, we will probably need to either buy zero things or sell the house. Ugh - might have to move back to a lease land idea or an apartment. Both sound sad and awful to me.
As for the traveling - he'd be happy with day trips around. And thinks that we could probably manage a bit more - just not every week. Maybe once a month or so. That's what we are going to do.
And opt to win a lottery.
Tomorrow I have a seminar that I'm going to with the walking group. Day thing on ? don't remember. It's an outing for me for a few hours. Maureen is going.
Speaking of Maureen, she and Mike put their house up for sale on Thursday and sold it Friday, above asking, no conditions, open moving. Good for them. They were over on Sunday as they were to have an open house - not needed now - and needed to go somewhere with the dog. Said come over. She had gone last Thursday to that Art Shop we had been at and did some art there that day instead of walking. Fair enough as I did text that I didn't think I was walking. Had thought of bring Moonbeam to the vet, but he was ok. (?) So I asked her if she had done anymore art, either at home or at the shop. She snipped at me how could she? she was busy? had a tone of why would you ask such a stupid question. So I shut up again. So glad they sold and are moving. It depresses me to have such a person in my life, that me asking something like that causes her to snip at me. It's not the kind of friendship I want to be in. Have about 3 months until they must move, and I don't see her that often anymore so that's good.
Look forward to tomorrow's seminar. Bit calmer with the foods, not sure what I'm going to do about the lunch that they will be serving. And then on Tuesday (4 days later) we go to TO. Maybe I will just do IP in between those days, not worry about it so much, and hope weight gain wont be more then the 3 lbs I've already put on.
That's about it.
My thyroid blood test came back, still waiting for Reverse FT3. But T3 is up, and T4 is low. Meaning a maybe a bit of iron issue. That could be as I've always had some trouble with iron since my last surgery. It's wacky. Going to look at getting some iron pills then. Actually might help with the depression/sadness etc too. Maybe it's not so much the Metho then.
One of the things I thought of last night was that empty feeling I have. Think that has to do with the missing God part. Use to help but now since God is gone - it's just empty and I feel it.
Talked with AJ about a new car (SUV) and travelling today. He said if we took the money from his RRSP - that would leave us, him, with about 3 years of living money - for the day to day things that he has to take money out for. Well that's not comfortable for me. As it is his RRSP is going to last us about 6 years. Then for us to have comfortable money - as in making it day to day like now, we will probably need to either buy zero things or sell the house. Ugh - might have to move back to a lease land idea or an apartment. Both sound sad and awful to me.
As for the traveling - he'd be happy with day trips around. And thinks that we could probably manage a bit more - just not every week. Maybe once a month or so. That's what we are going to do.
And opt to win a lottery.
Tomorrow I have a seminar that I'm going to with the walking group. Day thing on ? don't remember. It's an outing for me for a few hours. Maureen is going.
Speaking of Maureen, she and Mike put their house up for sale on Thursday and sold it Friday, above asking, no conditions, open moving. Good for them. They were over on Sunday as they were to have an open house - not needed now - and needed to go somewhere with the dog. Said come over. She had gone last Thursday to that Art Shop we had been at and did some art there that day instead of walking. Fair enough as I did text that I didn't think I was walking. Had thought of bring Moonbeam to the vet, but he was ok. (?) So I asked her if she had done anymore art, either at home or at the shop. She snipped at me how could she? she was busy? had a tone of why would you ask such a stupid question. So I shut up again. So glad they sold and are moving. It depresses me to have such a person in my life, that me asking something like that causes her to snip at me. It's not the kind of friendship I want to be in. Have about 3 months until they must move, and I don't see her that often anymore so that's good.
Look forward to tomorrow's seminar. Bit calmer with the foods, not sure what I'm going to do about the lunch that they will be serving. And then on Tuesday (4 days later) we go to TO. Maybe I will just do IP in between those days, not worry about it so much, and hope weight gain wont be more then the 3 lbs I've already put on.
That's about it.
Monday, March 19, 2018
The Between
Not about ninjas, pirates or lasers......
In morbid thoughts phase again. F*k that Metho. Been in it for a few weeks now. And the eating is out the window too.
I was thinking of those people who hold on to every second of life - refuse to die. Aim to live forever. Do all the things they can so that they live. How amazing are they.
Then there are those that can't be here. They leave as quick as they can. Those that end up in suicides. Not saying anything about them per sue. (?that the right word?)
I was thinking of the BETWEEN. I was thinking of the end. I was thinking, I was thinking I will be glad (probably) to get to the end.
There are those that it's all about the journey. They can drive and not know where they are going - as it doesn't matter. AJ sometimes says - when I want to do something and I don't know what - lets take a drive. I think he says that more cause he's at a lose as to what to do. I can't do just a drive. It's too stressful for me. I'm one of those that needs to go somewhere - have an end. I can somewhat wander around, but need to know 'why' I'm wandering - even if it's just for the wandering itself. I can wander a forest or a mall. Maybe a street on foot. But not a drive.
Seems for me it's about the end. I go for the goal. Except weight!!! Ugh. But then again - it's all about the goal - 160 lbs.
Hum.....
Back to the between. I do want to look back and see what I have done at the end of my life. And I do want to do things in my life. But there is a part of me that wishes I was at the end and now looking back at it. Not that I am pushing to make a new end. I don't know if I can say I live. I try to. I want to. Seems kinda boring from this side. Answer probably is go help others and forget about yourself. Guess I should just end this here then.
......
That freaks me out inside - to do volunteer work. Talked about that before. Can't decide if the freak out is because I don't or can't or afraid or too lazy or ??? to do it. Besides doesn't taking care of AJ count as something? He's exhausting at times. But then I love him.
That kinda morbided me too - of him being gone. Though I knew that was possible without anyone else saying it. What saddens me about that is would I ever be with someone else. Is there someone else that would be caring, kind, patient etc with all my crap? And I really, really, really, really don't want to chase another man in my life again. I chased my first husband and I basically chased AJ. If anyone were to be in my life after AJ, then I so really want him to CHASE me. (Has to be someone I'd like doing the chasing too). I know without a doubt that AJ loves me with all he is.... but I'm not first in his life, he is. I get that. It's who he is. He thinks of himself a lot first and sometimes forgets me. But in his being he also so much cares and thinks of me. It's hard to explain. If there was a fire... he'd save himself. Me... I'd be trying to save him and the pets first. Then again - could I even be with someone else after AJ? I don't know. Not that it's in the cards for a few years. ha.
There are a lot of people who's lives are worse off then mine and I'm sure they'd read this and think really? What the f*k are you whining about. They'd be right. And yet, here I am whining. I don't really know why. Inside me just flops around. Probably the Metho.... and a need for a change/trip. And volunteering....yeah. I just do not want to let more people down by doing that then dropping off. That, dropping out/off, sounds to me worse then trying. Like when a few years ago I volunteered to help run the VON exercise program - did it for about 3 months, then stopped, then tried again for a few weeks here, few week there... then nothing.
And this doesn't go anywhere. Time for dinner.
Saturday, March 17, 2018
Bunnies
Bunnies found. I happened to be in a store, and I walked down an isle and suddenly, there they were. NOT in the bulk barn either. They were in a bag in Walmart. So yes, I did buy one (1) bag - which is basically a nice handful. Was surprised and happy. Now I can skip going to Bulk Barn when we go to Barrie. We don't have much time to waste time either.
This week one Trust Me I'm A Doctor: (I like this show... as you've probably noticed)
Two things were of interest to me.
1. They talked about when it's best to eat eggs, bacon and toast. Breakfast or dinner. They took his blood every hour after breakfast, then after dinner. The results showed that the breakfast meal was better and the body worked the foods, but for dinner the meal increased the fats in the body. Apparently the body at evening/night already pushes the fat etc up so that it lasts during the night. So the best time to eat fat etc is in the morning, and the body can deal with it better.
2. They did a study for 6 weeks on two groups. One group ate as usual and the other group ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner closer together, thus 'fasting' after 6pm until 6 am the next morning. Results for that - second group's blood work was better, cholesterol down, improved sleep etc. Apparently the fasting was of benefit to the body.
Both of these are something I'd like to do. Tho the 6pm is more along the line of 8pm as we really don't have breakfast until 8am usually.
I called Jaqui. I am finding that I'm struggling with being down and wanting to eat. I think there is something going on inside that is causing me to eat. Mostly what I can sense is I want to go somewhere. I want a trip. I don't know if the trip to Barrie/Toronto will help. I want to go somewhere else - maybe that's why I thought of wanting to go to the States. I'm not sure really what it is I want. I feel like I can't breathe. I'm stressed too about the money. It's not like we really have money to just travel.
We went out today, me in hopes of going somewhere would help me..... it didn't. Just made me realize I super need to talk with Jacqui. We went to a psychic fair in London. We were not early as we had papers saying 12 noon. But it it was actually 2 pm. We went for lunch. McD's had a burger and coffee. The fair - met two of interest to me. One I saw, other I just got the card. The other I went to was ok. First one basically talked of AJ and his health. Not great in the long run. In years she was wondering of a blood clot to the lung. She said I would have either 5 hours or 5 days to say good bye to him. I said I was ok with her telling me of his death, so she did. It's in years - I'm not going to write how soon as I don't want to or feel I need to. One of the other things she said was that our moved saved his life. Apparently if we had not moved when we did, AJ could have had a fall and hit his head and not gotten help soon enough. Explains my sudden / our sudden move. She said there would be another move in my life. Heard that one before. (8 yrs, now 7 yrs) Her take - either in 3 yrs or 7 yrs. She also said there was a woman I will be doing something with. And that there will be a dark haired man I will meet too. Both those are what I heard from Anne-Marie too - she said I was here to meet 2 women and 1 man that would be important for me to know. I liked this woman - I liked her insights. Upsetting in a way, but I'm one that needs to know so that I can be prepared.
Other one was ok - basically the general stuff nothing overly exciting. Neither said much about money. This one said a bit of travel we would be doing. Said I had angels and fairies around me. Said that nature was important to me. Said I was going to live a long life. Oh great ..... hope I have the money for it! She also said that my oldest pet was the funny one, and would be with me a long time still.......that one surprised me as Moonbeam has tossed up a bit of blood once, sleeps a lot (ok, he's a cat), eats a lot but it skinny. I just can't figure out whether to bring him again to the vet, for what exactly. Last fall Dr N did numerous tests that came back perfect. Only thing I can think - might be his teeth, tho they appear ok to me.
Well, that's about it.
Ta.
This week one Trust Me I'm A Doctor: (I like this show... as you've probably noticed)
Two things were of interest to me.
1. They talked about when it's best to eat eggs, bacon and toast. Breakfast or dinner. They took his blood every hour after breakfast, then after dinner. The results showed that the breakfast meal was better and the body worked the foods, but for dinner the meal increased the fats in the body. Apparently the body at evening/night already pushes the fat etc up so that it lasts during the night. So the best time to eat fat etc is in the morning, and the body can deal with it better.
2. They did a study for 6 weeks on two groups. One group ate as usual and the other group ate breakfast, lunch, and dinner closer together, thus 'fasting' after 6pm until 6 am the next morning. Results for that - second group's blood work was better, cholesterol down, improved sleep etc. Apparently the fasting was of benefit to the body.
Both of these are something I'd like to do. Tho the 6pm is more along the line of 8pm as we really don't have breakfast until 8am usually.
I called Jaqui. I am finding that I'm struggling with being down and wanting to eat. I think there is something going on inside that is causing me to eat. Mostly what I can sense is I want to go somewhere. I want a trip. I don't know if the trip to Barrie/Toronto will help. I want to go somewhere else - maybe that's why I thought of wanting to go to the States. I'm not sure really what it is I want. I feel like I can't breathe. I'm stressed too about the money. It's not like we really have money to just travel.
We went out today, me in hopes of going somewhere would help me..... it didn't. Just made me realize I super need to talk with Jacqui. We went to a psychic fair in London. We were not early as we had papers saying 12 noon. But it it was actually 2 pm. We went for lunch. McD's had a burger and coffee. The fair - met two of interest to me. One I saw, other I just got the card. The other I went to was ok. First one basically talked of AJ and his health. Not great in the long run. In years she was wondering of a blood clot to the lung. She said I would have either 5 hours or 5 days to say good bye to him. I said I was ok with her telling me of his death, so she did. It's in years - I'm not going to write how soon as I don't want to or feel I need to. One of the other things she said was that our moved saved his life. Apparently if we had not moved when we did, AJ could have had a fall and hit his head and not gotten help soon enough. Explains my sudden / our sudden move. She said there would be another move in my life. Heard that one before. (8 yrs, now 7 yrs) Her take - either in 3 yrs or 7 yrs. She also said there was a woman I will be doing something with. And that there will be a dark haired man I will meet too. Both those are what I heard from Anne-Marie too - she said I was here to meet 2 women and 1 man that would be important for me to know. I liked this woman - I liked her insights. Upsetting in a way, but I'm one that needs to know so that I can be prepared.
Other one was ok - basically the general stuff nothing overly exciting. Neither said much about money. This one said a bit of travel we would be doing. Said I had angels and fairies around me. Said that nature was important to me. Said I was going to live a long life. Oh great ..... hope I have the money for it! She also said that my oldest pet was the funny one, and would be with me a long time still.......that one surprised me as Moonbeam has tossed up a bit of blood once, sleeps a lot (ok, he's a cat), eats a lot but it skinny. I just can't figure out whether to bring him again to the vet, for what exactly. Last fall Dr N did numerous tests that came back perfect. Only thing I can think - might be his teeth, tho they appear ok to me.
Well, that's about it.
Ta.
Thursday, March 15, 2018
After Dinner
I've been fed. So I should be able to blog a bit. ha ha ha.
I joined an Arthritis site and learned something. RA and Psoriasis Arthritis are two different things!!! I just never thought about it after my RA Doc listed that was what I had. Will be needing to ask her which I have. It's rare to have both. By reading the differences, I think I'm on the Psoriasis side.
I also plan to ask her about the biologics. Metho isn't cutting it for me. Today is day 6 after my injection of Metho and I'm happy. Basically at this point I'm getting 2 maybe 3 days up.
Got my hair cut and coloured today. It's shorter on the left side (on purpose) and aiming to get the right side longer. Saw a photo in a Women's First magazine that stuck me it might look nice on me. The current short and very bit longer on right looks nice. Colour is fixed from my doing it myself - and ending up semi orangy/brassy - to a nice brown with highlights. Guess I'd just be better off letting a hairdresser colour my hair.
It's still cold outside, and has snowed. I'm still surprised when I go out to walk Jax or shovel a bit that my lungs/chest hurts. The cold goes down into my stomach and makes me nausea'd. Said to AJ that this year on December 1 to March 31 next year we should go to Florida, he suggested Arizona. Wish we could.
I went for weigh in on Monday. Was down 2 pounds. And I was....oh, ok. I just wasn't thrilled. It wasn't that I wasn't happy about it, just eh. I don't know why. Afterwards we went for breakfast. I knew we were going for breakfast - I planned it. I had the breakfast special - 2 eggs, ham, toast, (with peanut butter) and potatoe fries. It was good. Skipped lunch, which was the more wrong thing then anything of that day. Dinner was chicken and salad and bam......munchies all evening.
I wasn't upset more confused. I realized first I waited way too long for breakfast, over 3 hours, was starving for breakfast. Loved the toast but really didn't need the pototoes, could of had a few from AJ. Skipping lunch wasn't a good idea. And making dinner super light again a no-no.
As I stated before, I'm doing this on I weigh 160 lbs, I choose foods and amounts to maintain 160 lbs. I balanced yesterday out with proper foods. Today I'm down 1 more pound. I'm content with that. The eating breakfast I think was good for me - I had been too down about eating and needed a switch for a bit. But just one meal. Next planned outing is when we are in Toronto at the end of month. I plan to bring my dinner as I will be wiped that day and having dinner alone as AJ will be in his meeting. Breakfast will again be my not worry meal. Will see how that goes.
Other then that...kinda quiet lately.
I joined an Arthritis site and learned something. RA and Psoriasis Arthritis are two different things!!! I just never thought about it after my RA Doc listed that was what I had. Will be needing to ask her which I have. It's rare to have both. By reading the differences, I think I'm on the Psoriasis side.
I also plan to ask her about the biologics. Metho isn't cutting it for me. Today is day 6 after my injection of Metho and I'm happy. Basically at this point I'm getting 2 maybe 3 days up.
Got my hair cut and coloured today. It's shorter on the left side (on purpose) and aiming to get the right side longer. Saw a photo in a Women's First magazine that stuck me it might look nice on me. The current short and very bit longer on right looks nice. Colour is fixed from my doing it myself - and ending up semi orangy/brassy - to a nice brown with highlights. Guess I'd just be better off letting a hairdresser colour my hair.
It's still cold outside, and has snowed. I'm still surprised when I go out to walk Jax or shovel a bit that my lungs/chest hurts. The cold goes down into my stomach and makes me nausea'd. Said to AJ that this year on December 1 to March 31 next year we should go to Florida, he suggested Arizona. Wish we could.
I went for weigh in on Monday. Was down 2 pounds. And I was....oh, ok. I just wasn't thrilled. It wasn't that I wasn't happy about it, just eh. I don't know why. Afterwards we went for breakfast. I knew we were going for breakfast - I planned it. I had the breakfast special - 2 eggs, ham, toast, (with peanut butter) and potatoe fries. It was good. Skipped lunch, which was the more wrong thing then anything of that day. Dinner was chicken and salad and bam......munchies all evening.
I wasn't upset more confused. I realized first I waited way too long for breakfast, over 3 hours, was starving for breakfast. Loved the toast but really didn't need the pototoes, could of had a few from AJ. Skipping lunch wasn't a good idea. And making dinner super light again a no-no.
As I stated before, I'm doing this on I weigh 160 lbs, I choose foods and amounts to maintain 160 lbs. I balanced yesterday out with proper foods. Today I'm down 1 more pound. I'm content with that. The eating breakfast I think was good for me - I had been too down about eating and needed a switch for a bit. But just one meal. Next planned outing is when we are in Toronto at the end of month. I plan to bring my dinner as I will be wiped that day and having dinner alone as AJ will be in his meeting. Breakfast will again be my not worry meal. Will see how that goes.
Other then that...kinda quiet lately.
Tuesday, March 13, 2018
Sunday, March 11, 2018
Pour
Went to bed early last night. Therefore I ended up waking up early too! And that spring forward change....I got up at 720am. Jax and cats fed, Jax walked, and AJ was up so we went to Superstore to get some groceries. Ugh - I never seem to come out of that with a bit of food and low cost. I do look for the 30% off etc.
Then after I went to the Dollarstore. I needed some more art supplies. I've been doing acrylic pours. Basically mix acrylic colours in a cup and pour them on the canvass. LOTS of tutorials on Youtube.
I do enjoy doing them as they create almost their own design. Very similar in a way to the wax art I was doing in Barrie when I melted crayons on the iron and then iron it on papers. Messier too. I've done a few - have to get photos of them one day and show you. But in a way, not the most interesting for me. No creating in a way. And it is done fast - so basically if I could I'd probably be able to do like 20 of them in an hour. Just don't want to do SO many at once. I will do a few more then probably go back to creating with paint. I have a few things that I'd like to add, like feathers, to pictures. Maybe I will add some feathers to an art pour.
Nice day outside, but too cold still for me. That cold just continues to get in my lungs.
Had trouble yesterday at being hungry all day, but not really hungry. I think it had somewhat to do with emotions. I simply have been feeling down or sad the past few days. Yesterday it really hit hard. It's the Metho. Takes 4 days out of me. I don't know if I can continue doing it. I'm so sad and down. It's a dark place to be and move into or thru. I know not to let myself get into it and stay there - to remind myself it's the medication and in a few days I will feel better. But still. AJ continues to ask me if I'm ok and feels so lost since he's unable to help me when I'm in it. I need to remember he cares, and not bite his head off. Sometimes he will ask if I'm ok, I'll say no. Then about 5 or 10 mins later he will ask again - and I want to bite him/ scream and swear - what makes you think 5 or 10 mins is going to change? I don't say mean things to him. Basically just - I just told you, nothings changed. And I want to eat. Between the leptin in my brain being short circuited and the sad hunger it's a bit of a fight. I usually do increase a bit of the food, I just can't not.
Today is better.
I also continue to listen to those binaural beats. Listen to ones on weight loss/ eating / stomach (metho causes nausea) / relaxing / wealth sometimes / chakras etc.
That's about it. It's 646pm and so light out.....now just warm up!
Then after I went to the Dollarstore. I needed some more art supplies. I've been doing acrylic pours. Basically mix acrylic colours in a cup and pour them on the canvass. LOTS of tutorials on Youtube.
I do enjoy doing them as they create almost their own design. Very similar in a way to the wax art I was doing in Barrie when I melted crayons on the iron and then iron it on papers. Messier too. I've done a few - have to get photos of them one day and show you. But in a way, not the most interesting for me. No creating in a way. And it is done fast - so basically if I could I'd probably be able to do like 20 of them in an hour. Just don't want to do SO many at once. I will do a few more then probably go back to creating with paint. I have a few things that I'd like to add, like feathers, to pictures. Maybe I will add some feathers to an art pour.
Nice day outside, but too cold still for me. That cold just continues to get in my lungs.
Had trouble yesterday at being hungry all day, but not really hungry. I think it had somewhat to do with emotions. I simply have been feeling down or sad the past few days. Yesterday it really hit hard. It's the Metho. Takes 4 days out of me. I don't know if I can continue doing it. I'm so sad and down. It's a dark place to be and move into or thru. I know not to let myself get into it and stay there - to remind myself it's the medication and in a few days I will feel better. But still. AJ continues to ask me if I'm ok and feels so lost since he's unable to help me when I'm in it. I need to remember he cares, and not bite his head off. Sometimes he will ask if I'm ok, I'll say no. Then about 5 or 10 mins later he will ask again - and I want to bite him/ scream and swear - what makes you think 5 or 10 mins is going to change? I don't say mean things to him. Basically just - I just told you, nothings changed. And I want to eat. Between the leptin in my brain being short circuited and the sad hunger it's a bit of a fight. I usually do increase a bit of the food, I just can't not.
Today is better.
I also continue to listen to those binaural beats. Listen to ones on weight loss/ eating / stomach (metho causes nausea) / relaxing / wealth sometimes / chakras etc.
That's about it. It's 646pm and so light out.....now just warm up!
Friday, March 9, 2018
Eyes
I've been flaring a bit lately. Not sure if it's due to being back on the IP/IPA plan. And I needed to take those Prednisones a few days ago. I'm beginning to wonder if I should take a few more.
In the last few days my face has become pimply. Not that I have pimples. It's more along the line of psoriasis. The worse part about this psoriasis on my face is that those pimply-es are right near my left eye. It upsets me. I want to cry. It's itchy, and it scares me of - could I loose my eyesight? NOT something I want to lose. So I get stressed over it, which doesn't help calm the psoriasis.
I don't know what to do. I have been putting some Metro cream as near as I can on my face, but it's still there. I'm upset.
Started this a few days ago......and got busy......and in pain.
Oh great, more whining about the pain? No.
So onward
We were watching Trust Me I'm A Doctor a few nights ago, and he was doing a study on a) protein and b) exercise.
Now with the protein I know from my FB IP/A sites that when someone posts they want to have their 8oz meat and then a package for dessert OR they want the package with the meal, that they can't have the whole 8oz and a package. The others say that you can have a package with 4oz of meat though. Apparently you are not allowed to have 8oz and a package. Confused?
Then they ask why. The story is that you can't have that much protein at once, the body can't handle it/use it. Which leads me back to the show - it's true. The body can only use so much protein, and if you have more - it just turns to fat. Explains why on Dr Poon I wasn't losing weight as I was eating chicken breast after chicken breast when I was hungry. Per Dr Poon's directions. Guess it was too much for my body. I said to AJ now that I understand the why, I will watch to make sure that I don't over do protein in one sitting - or during the day.
The other about the exercise - they did a study to see if you burned more fat on a full stomach or empty stomach. Turns out women burn more fat on a full stomach but men burn more fat on an empty stomach. Lesson there is - I should be first having breakfast/lunch or dinner then exercising...... ugh yeah. I'm just not an exerciser. Though I do shovel some snow in the morning, unfortunately on an empty stomach. Will need to work on that. And maybe one day getting in some more exercise. Summer is coming, and the garden is waiting..... that will be my exercise. Walking Jax, I don't really count as exercise so much as it's just a bit in the morning after his breakfast/before mine and a bit in the evening. Summertime, probably will be more walking mid morning/ or afternoon so that will probably work better.
Time change this Saturday/ Sunday. I'll be sleeping thru it.
on Saturday night.....
Tuesday, March 6, 2018
Is it?.... Did She?
Yesterday was super busy. We also had the guy come to check and clean the appliances - glad they are in good working order. Basically the only thing we really need to look at one day is possible new dishwasher.
So, is this the post I've been mentioning? Yes it is.
Have you been wondering since the beginning of February? Vaguely remember me talking about wanting to start IP again at the first of February. Well. I didn't hit the ground running... but I did pat the floor walking.
We still had a few things left on February 1. Like sweet potatoe and pergioes. (? spelling) But I did start. And I stopped all the other stuff on Feb 1 like junk foods, sweets etc. I didn't post about it because I wanted to make sure I was able and ready to do this, and I didn't want to say I was, then not. I did it though. And I'm down about 15 pounds so far!!!
I say about because on Feb 1 I just didn't weigh myself. I really didn't want to weigh again. Just wanted to start and let the clothes do the work. That lasted about 2 weeks. I did go back to the clinic here to do IP. I got weighed in with her. 231. Well. What can I say. I knew I was eating like there was no tomorrow. I knew I'd be way up there - my clothes were telling me that. I knew what I was doing. At least I didn't go over what I started at originally with Dr Poon. 242.
As Jacqui said, I'd be ready in February - which I was. And that my body would remember - which it is. I was really ready to do this again, and once I started it was easier to get back into the routine again. Tho this time around I am looking at it more from the point that I choose to do this, I choose to be 160 lbs (hoping to go lower then that 180) and that I choose to live, maintain and eat foods that will help me be 160 lbs. Above all, not go nuts with the weight loss or food choices. No more 'cheats'.
I say No More Cheats as in I will no longer consider foods that I eat acceptable or cheating. I look at it as I AM 160 lbs - what would be my choice? I choose to maintain 160 lbs - what is my amounts? Do I want --- this food --- or to maintain/be 160 lbs? Is it worth the balance? That said - I ate a McDonalds bagel the other day. AJ loves bagels and wanted to try one for the last few weeks. I decided that we would go for my weigh in, and then we would have a bagel for breakfast - no guilt. Lunch and dinner continued as usual.
When we had gone to my mom's in February - same thing. I made the choice to eat what she put on the table - enjoy it, and that was it. Back to usual at the next meal. What was most challenging was Bulk Barn. They ticked me off! It's almost Easter and I love the marshmallow bunnies they have. I had decided, told AJ, planned it out, that I would have one handful of bunnies. And dammit - no BB in London is selling them. They couldn't explain why as they are a popular seller. I looked at all the other Easter treats - and said to myself NO - that's not what I came in for, not what I wanted, and I'm not buying something else. I'd rather have a proper IP bar then instead. Which I did.
I'm still on a hunt for those marshmallow bunnies though. We are going to Barrie at the end of the month, and Bulk Barn is a stop to see if they have them. I guess I should just look it up and see if BB is selling them......
The Prednisone on the weekend was difficult as it did trigger hunger in me - even though I was eating my IP choices, I was still just plain hungry and empty feeling inside. Better now.
The other thing is I decided, due to cost, that I would switch a bit over to IPA - the IP alternative route. The IP clinic wasn't getting in some of the stuff, like shakes and pudding for me and I needed them, so I looked into more IPA foods, went to Costco and got the Premier Shakes, Kirkland bars. I also found IP Metrics on line, and a Proti Diet place in Sask to order from. The IP Metrics bars------ oh so good. The cost is less. I still order IP foods, now that she has her order in, as I continue to go to get weighed in. Don't think it's fair to just weigh in and not get some of the foods, at least for the time being.
We also are talking of going over to the States to get a few things. Of course, can't get them here in Canada....... Premier Shakes has vanilla and chocolate in Costco. In the States there's also Caramel, Cookies and Cream, Peach (and Strawberry and Banana which I don't care for). I'm hoping to get them plus a few things from other stores.
GNC here I can get a few Quest products, powders and bars. Then there is Dr Poon and Low Carb Grocery. I've got a good handle on where I can get most of my products from now. And a big choice of items too.
I've made tons of muffins, breads, and donuts. Ordered a donut baking sheet to make little ones with. Have a lot in the freezer now. Most mornings are 1/2 a shake with a muffin. This morning I added a hard boiled egg as I was going to the dog park with Jax and it's cold out.
Man, was it cold out! Came home, had a tea and changed clothes to try to warm up. Still a bit cold. Lunch - which is in a moment - will be cauliflower/broccoli soup with a 'loaf' and more tea. Dinner tonight is ground turkey, leftover mashed cauliflower and ? some other veg. Snack tonight will be a new bar! Just got the order in from Amazon. Pure Protein bars. Which Walmart sells too, but I ordered stuff from Amazon and needed a few more $$ to make a free shipping.
That's my big announcement. I'm happy. I'm choosing.
Ta
So, is this the post I've been mentioning? Yes it is.
Have you been wondering since the beginning of February? Vaguely remember me talking about wanting to start IP again at the first of February. Well. I didn't hit the ground running... but I did pat the floor walking.
We still had a few things left on February 1. Like sweet potatoe and pergioes. (? spelling) But I did start. And I stopped all the other stuff on Feb 1 like junk foods, sweets etc. I didn't post about it because I wanted to make sure I was able and ready to do this, and I didn't want to say I was, then not. I did it though. And I'm down about 15 pounds so far!!!
I say about because on Feb 1 I just didn't weigh myself. I really didn't want to weigh again. Just wanted to start and let the clothes do the work. That lasted about 2 weeks. I did go back to the clinic here to do IP. I got weighed in with her. 231. Well. What can I say. I knew I was eating like there was no tomorrow. I knew I'd be way up there - my clothes were telling me that. I knew what I was doing. At least I didn't go over what I started at originally with Dr Poon. 242.
As Jacqui said, I'd be ready in February - which I was. And that my body would remember - which it is. I was really ready to do this again, and once I started it was easier to get back into the routine again. Tho this time around I am looking at it more from the point that I choose to do this, I choose to be 160 lbs (hoping to go lower then that 180) and that I choose to live, maintain and eat foods that will help me be 160 lbs. Above all, not go nuts with the weight loss or food choices. No more 'cheats'.
I say No More Cheats as in I will no longer consider foods that I eat acceptable or cheating. I look at it as I AM 160 lbs - what would be my choice? I choose to maintain 160 lbs - what is my amounts? Do I want --- this food --- or to maintain/be 160 lbs? Is it worth the balance? That said - I ate a McDonalds bagel the other day. AJ loves bagels and wanted to try one for the last few weeks. I decided that we would go for my weigh in, and then we would have a bagel for breakfast - no guilt. Lunch and dinner continued as usual.
When we had gone to my mom's in February - same thing. I made the choice to eat what she put on the table - enjoy it, and that was it. Back to usual at the next meal. What was most challenging was Bulk Barn. They ticked me off! It's almost Easter and I love the marshmallow bunnies they have. I had decided, told AJ, planned it out, that I would have one handful of bunnies. And dammit - no BB in London is selling them. They couldn't explain why as they are a popular seller. I looked at all the other Easter treats - and said to myself NO - that's not what I came in for, not what I wanted, and I'm not buying something else. I'd rather have a proper IP bar then instead. Which I did.
I'm still on a hunt for those marshmallow bunnies though. We are going to Barrie at the end of the month, and Bulk Barn is a stop to see if they have them. I guess I should just look it up and see if BB is selling them......
The Prednisone on the weekend was difficult as it did trigger hunger in me - even though I was eating my IP choices, I was still just plain hungry and empty feeling inside. Better now.
The other thing is I decided, due to cost, that I would switch a bit over to IPA - the IP alternative route. The IP clinic wasn't getting in some of the stuff, like shakes and pudding for me and I needed them, so I looked into more IPA foods, went to Costco and got the Premier Shakes, Kirkland bars. I also found IP Metrics on line, and a Proti Diet place in Sask to order from. The IP Metrics bars------ oh so good. The cost is less. I still order IP foods, now that she has her order in, as I continue to go to get weighed in. Don't think it's fair to just weigh in and not get some of the foods, at least for the time being.
We also are talking of going over to the States to get a few things. Of course, can't get them here in Canada....... Premier Shakes has vanilla and chocolate in Costco. In the States there's also Caramel, Cookies and Cream, Peach (and Strawberry and Banana which I don't care for). I'm hoping to get them plus a few things from other stores.
GNC here I can get a few Quest products, powders and bars. Then there is Dr Poon and Low Carb Grocery. I've got a good handle on where I can get most of my products from now. And a big choice of items too.
I've made tons of muffins, breads, and donuts. Ordered a donut baking sheet to make little ones with. Have a lot in the freezer now. Most mornings are 1/2 a shake with a muffin. This morning I added a hard boiled egg as I was going to the dog park with Jax and it's cold out.
Man, was it cold out! Came home, had a tea and changed clothes to try to warm up. Still a bit cold. Lunch - which is in a moment - will be cauliflower/broccoli soup with a 'loaf' and more tea. Dinner tonight is ground turkey, leftover mashed cauliflower and ? some other veg. Snack tonight will be a new bar! Just got the order in from Amazon. Pure Protein bars. Which Walmart sells too, but I ordered stuff from Amazon and needed a few more $$ to make a free shipping.
That's my big announcement. I'm happy. I'm choosing.
Ta
Saturday, March 3, 2018
A Little Bit of Prednisone
A little bit of Prednisone will take away the pain again.... a little bit of Prednisone will make me hyper....
Anyone remember a song called A Little Bit of Soap? by I want to say - Jarmels ...? Anyway.
I'm hyper and very up. I couldn't sleep last night due to the pain. And it wasn't major screaming pain, just low, rumbling, constant throbbing pain that one has to just lay there and realize it's going on. If I kept moving, doing things I didn't notice it really - not like major pain. But at night.... different story. Would feel it, wake up with it.
At one point I tried to send healing light because I couldn't think of anything else to that night... and I couldn't because I didn't know WHERE to send it! As every part of my insides were throbbing and rumbling.
So this morning I decided I would take some of my expired Prednisone. Did call the pharmacist and he said since they were just expired as of January, they would be ok. I didn't have another prescription on file - seeing my RA end of the month. Besides to send her a request, I would have to wait until Monday.
And now I'm not sleeping, or sleepy. I did do baking....
And I went to the dog park for the first time. Jax met Ollie and they ran. Went well. Tomorrow I will meet another woman at the dog park. We have a F/B for the dog park, and a few days ago I posted, asking for a play mate for Jax. A few replied - most said the little dog moms meet around 9am weekdays. I pm'ed a few and today I sent one a message, she said Sunday would work. Looking forward to it.
It helped lifted me as I feel that I might meet a few new people that I could possibility socialize a bit with. I need that - I can't keep going with the one woman I met here that stresses me out. Maur keeps sounding pissy if I say something / question something / suggest something. I don't need that in my life.
Best too - one of the dog person is willing to clean cat litter! Actually two of them are.
AJ has a MOD board meeting on March 27 and me having my RA appointment on March 28th.....AND they pay for the hotel for the night for AJ.... we are driving. Will be a very busy day (hummm maybe I should take a few Prednisone that day?) We are leaving at 530am on 27th, driving to Barrie as I need to go to some stores there. We have to skip going to the old place to visit as there is no time. And then boot it to Toronto for 330pm. I will stay the evening at the hotel - will need the rest. Breakfast at the hotel, me to my appointment and AJ to the mall (via Wheeltrans). Then home.
Jax will go to his daycare place and stay overnight. But the cats..... I really, really hate to leave them two days alone so long. So it looks like I found someone to just pop in and check on them - so glad about that. Hope it works out, still need to hear back from her.
I know this was a bit of more of a rambly post. Not the one I planned to write. So that means there will be one coming in the few days again! Aren't you so happy about it? ha ha ha 😸
Anyone remember a song called A Little Bit of Soap? by I want to say - Jarmels ...? Anyway.
I'm hyper and very up. I couldn't sleep last night due to the pain. And it wasn't major screaming pain, just low, rumbling, constant throbbing pain that one has to just lay there and realize it's going on. If I kept moving, doing things I didn't notice it really - not like major pain. But at night.... different story. Would feel it, wake up with it.
At one point I tried to send healing light because I couldn't think of anything else to that night... and I couldn't because I didn't know WHERE to send it! As every part of my insides were throbbing and rumbling.
So this morning I decided I would take some of my expired Prednisone. Did call the pharmacist and he said since they were just expired as of January, they would be ok. I didn't have another prescription on file - seeing my RA end of the month. Besides to send her a request, I would have to wait until Monday.
And now I'm not sleeping, or sleepy. I did do baking....
And I went to the dog park for the first time. Jax met Ollie and they ran. Went well. Tomorrow I will meet another woman at the dog park. We have a F/B for the dog park, and a few days ago I posted, asking for a play mate for Jax. A few replied - most said the little dog moms meet around 9am weekdays. I pm'ed a few and today I sent one a message, she said Sunday would work. Looking forward to it.
It helped lifted me as I feel that I might meet a few new people that I could possibility socialize a bit with. I need that - I can't keep going with the one woman I met here that stresses me out. Maur keeps sounding pissy if I say something / question something / suggest something. I don't need that in my life.
Best too - one of the dog person is willing to clean cat litter! Actually two of them are.
AJ has a MOD board meeting on March 27 and me having my RA appointment on March 28th.....AND they pay for the hotel for the night for AJ.... we are driving. Will be a very busy day (hummm maybe I should take a few Prednisone that day?) We are leaving at 530am on 27th, driving to Barrie as I need to go to some stores there. We have to skip going to the old place to visit as there is no time. And then boot it to Toronto for 330pm. I will stay the evening at the hotel - will need the rest. Breakfast at the hotel, me to my appointment and AJ to the mall (via Wheeltrans). Then home.
Jax will go to his daycare place and stay overnight. But the cats..... I really, really hate to leave them two days alone so long. So it looks like I found someone to just pop in and check on them - so glad about that. Hope it works out, still need to hear back from her.
I know this was a bit of more of a rambly post. Not the one I planned to write. So that means there will be one coming in the few days again! Aren't you so happy about it? ha ha ha 😸
Friday, March 2, 2018
Stay Tooned
Still down. Still not much to say. I haven't even spoken to friends, and very quiet with AJ. He's good - just hugs me, and lets me be. There is a part of me that's happy in moments. I know I'm good. I know it's just a swing. Sorry about it. I know this isn't the most exciting blog - though I do continue to post! Maybe a few more days - can you give me that? I will perk up soon I'm sure. I actually have something to write about, it's just going to take me a bit to write it up - and with that at the moment, I don't have me just at this second.
Thanks.
Thanks.
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