Interesting thing about that is in all the books I read they always talk of being in the NOW. If you think on the past, you get depressed, if you think on the future, you are aware. So it's all about the now - being in the present - noticing what is in the present etc. Her take -
You need to remember the past as what you did, but not live in your glory days. Uh, yeah - past in not my glory days, but that's besides the point. You don't only live in the future because then you don't become aware of where you are. BUT you don't live only in the now either. Because by doing that you become stuck in the now and never move towards the future.
She explained that you look back to remember what you did etc, and then turn to the future to see where you want to go, then make the plans to get there in the now. It is important to have something to focus towards, aim for so that you aren't stuck never getting or doing anything. I found that interesting and insightful. Reminds me that when I have a goal it's better and easier to live then just being in the present and not doing much.
Other then her, the rest of the day was basic. Very good singer came on and sang a few songs. Lunch was good. The vendors were interesting. I won a metal water bottle, but not just for water, can put hold stuff in too - not exactly a thermos.
Maureen...... she is kind, she picked me up, she confuses me. Her long time friend was at the seminar too sitting at another table. I said, oh we could have sat with her. I kinda thought it would have been nice to sit together as it's her friend and she might enjoy it. Maureen's response - I came with you, not her, if I wanted to sit with her, I would have come with her. OOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKK. I didn't know how to respond to that. That's nice that you thought to be with me since you came with me, but it's a crowd, I have walked around on myself, we aren't attached at the hip. I guess I can see her point in that she decided to be with me so she would stay with me - which is kind and nice. I just found it weird that we together, couldn't sit with her friend. But then, when I met her long time, since high school friend - I was glad. Didn't care for her. There was another woman at our table that I enjoyed her company - even though she talked mostly with Maureen as she was sitting beside her. Later I asked if she would like my email etc and maybe we could go for coffee. She was open to that idea and said she was trying to remember our names so she could find us on Facebook. Will see what comes from that.
Void.
Spoke with Jacqui last night. Explained I felt so empty from God. Her take was that I was in the void. As I had stated to her - I appreciate the beauty around me, recognize it, am glad for it..... I'm just at a loss of joy or thrill of it. She explained that I have become it, and not attached anymore. I am the beauty of the sunset, back yard, rocks and no longer need to feel an attachment to it to feel it. It's the void. It's actually a good thing. So now I continue to go deeper into the void and into myself and be me. Uh, who am I? Art. She said she saw art, creativity etc around me. I'm to keep being an artist to find myself. As I continue to do this that which I am will draw to me that what I need to be me. Yup. Makes sense to me. Really. I wonder though if I'm a starving artist.....doubt it. Ha ha ha! I do wonder tho what kind of artist I am. What that means. How I live that. I really can't see me selling my paintings etc as - they are nice, but I just can't see them sellable. As you can see:
Just a few of my pour paint pictures. Last one I did (not showed as I haven't taken a photo of it) I think is Sex. Can see a penis, ovaries, two animals having sex... in it. Surprised me. The first one up top with the dragonfly has two girls - depending on how you look at it, and either a hawk or God. I do enjoy making them, even if they cost me, just can't see them selling though. Then again - someone wants to buy one - I'm fine with that!
Jacqui also said I needed orange, lime green and pastel pink energy. Funny about those as she had said the last time - orange, green, pink. Guessing I'm still needing them. As much as purple is my favorite colour, since moving here, orange has become the colour I want. Will aim to make a pouring with those colours then and see what happens.
Mostly that's it. That and the thought of wanting to find purple pants, orange top, lime green runners with pastel pink laces......😊🙀
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