Surprise! Not exactly 21 days later, I know.
I didn't get success at asking them if I could avoid the dairy. Basically was told at RH to eat the dairy or leave. I found (later) I could avoid the nightshades as tomatoes were in salads, and I could pick around them. But the dairy.... there was a lot of it. When I went there and talked with the intake person, I explained about the dairy etc, she got the manager who said either eat it or leave. I felt my heart sink, I hadn't even unpacked yet or started anything. I get it is an addiction centre and people try to get their own way. Which I was doing, and they don't go for that. I knew too that I desperately needed to get 'clean', so I agreed and signed off on it. I had a feeling in the back of my head at that point I wasn't going to be able to stay 21 days, that I would stay until I couldn't handle the dairy anymore.
After a week, and many meals of dairy, the dairy became a secondary issue. I started having gall bladder pain. Now, I have been told about 2 years ago that I had polyps in my gall bladder, and then later gall stones. Once in a while it would flare a bit, but not enough to send me to the hospital to remove it, or for me to think on it a lot. I had read large amounts and a lot of fat weren't good for gall bladder issues. I basically forgot about it as it wasn't an issue for me. I didn't relate 20 ounces with large amounts (I knew it was but not large amounts that bother gb)......though I now think that was my Divine Spirit clouding that thought. Would have stopped me? Maybe? I don't know. What I do know is that I needed to detox. By Monday I was in pain with my right flank side and back side. My full stomach was pushing too much on my gall bladder and there was pain into my back. When I found out there was dairy that night, I basically lost it. I was crying. The inflaming I was getting from the dairy/nuts/eggs was getting worse, and the pain I had all day (had been already starting in day 4 with my gb), I just didn't know what to do.
I talked with the person in charge of the night shift. We decided on me having nuts (very common food there, almost daily, and RA inflaming but more manageable then dairy) I was to talk with my counselor in the morning. I couldn't sleep that well with the pain during the night. I thought in the morning I would try to stay even though I was worried I'd end up in the hospital having surgery at some point of the next 15 days. In the last 2 years, since I've known about my gb, I've never worried about surgery at all - until these last few days. I hoped I could somehow continue there. For breakfast, it was yogurt - I knew I was done. Even if they stopped the dairy at this point, I was so inflamed, my gb was causing a lot of pain - I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't eat the basic same things over and over (like nuts and eggs) without the inflammation flares, and I couldn't push the gb pain to the point of emergency surgery with the large amounts.
I said good bye to certain friends, saw the one woman I felt I needed to share something with to help her (Divine Spirit put us in the same room together alone - something her and I wouldn't normally do). I knew once I was leaving I wouldn't be able to talk to any of the others again after that. Saw my counselor and told her I was done. I said I would keep my promise, and I was ready to leave. She did offer to try to see if she could stop the dairy, but I said no, not with the gb pain on top of it. If she had succeeded, I suspect I have been back a few days later in agony. Leaving at that point I would have felt like an all consuming as*, instead of someone wisely taking care of themselves. I KNOW I need to listen and honour my body. Kinda one of the points I was going there for.
She was kind about it, and because I was there 8 days, I was able to get the book the doctor wrote, I also had gotten the doctor's CDs on the Biology of Addictions. She is a fantastic doctor. I got another CD on the food addiction part, wanted to give it away, but that plan on who I thought to give it to wasn't going to work, so I will offer it to my family doctor instead. Today I can watch my own copy with AJ, and start reading her book.
I'm still in some detoxing. My gb is much quieter. I'm still on plan. I've just moved up my days from 21 to 8 - re-adjusted the foods (more in amounts - have less and not that much in types) Still on no sugar, wheat, grains, and doing low carb. I have my support system in place, and I'm continuing.
I needed that time away in a place that would be able to start me off clean as I couldn't do it at home. At least not that easily at home. Granted 21 days there would have been more helpful, but I have now 8 days. I learnt a lot being there even in those few days. I received numerous insights, made friends, and got started off certain foods. Was it a waste of time? Knowing about my issues with dairy etc, gall bladder - should I have gone? Should I have removed myself from going? WITHOUT A DOUBT I know going was the best decision and glad I did. I needed to be there, not just for me but for a few specific women and their journey. My time, short as it was, had value for me.
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