Chill

Anxiety......worry.......confusion.......fear.......CHILL!!!!

My new baby boy was sleeping... SLEEPING ALL DAY.  That confused me.  I get new kittens are confused and scared, but all the sleeping really scared me.

I had a puddle of a kitten.  A boneless kitten.  I'd pick him up and he'd hang off my fingers/ hand.  I was so worried that he was going to stress to death.  He had barely eaten since coming home.

Then last night he started purring and rolling onto his back to get his belly rubbed.  He stretched out on the back of the couch.  And FINALLY I was able to breathe as I knew then that he was going to be ok.

At bedtime, he ate all his food - he's a RAW food boy.  Never touched his original bought home food.  He loved RAW and Stella & Chewy dehydrated raw.  Even the raw kibble.  He ate it all.  This morning he ate it all again.  Same with dinner.  And loved the chicken and cheese bits he got today.

He still goes to hide, except for the back of the couch.  If I put him there, he stretches out and sleeps.  In the dinning room he looks for places he can go under.  I had put him on a leash so I'm able to find him.  He doesn't mind the leash.  

He is doing well with Jax too.  Jax has sniffed him a few times with only an occasional hiss.  Princess....she's not impressed still.  Hope she comes around soon.  I need to keep him in the meditation room until they are all good together.

The stress I've been feeling hasn't been good for me.  Sunday was MTX injection night too.  So I'm wiped and on edge again.  I can feel when I look inside myself that I'm crying and jumping all around.  Not that it's over anything, just ????  I don't know, it does something to me emotionally, physically, mentally when I inject MTX.  I wish I didn't need to inject but I can feel days before that my joints are really starting to hurt and burn.  Once I shoot - I'm able to sleep better.  Not to mention the nausea that comes with it - I'm forcing myself to keep on track (so far, so good).  The fat involved with Keto I think helps.  Instead of looking to carbs to feel stomach better, I look to fat and need less to feel better.  It's like between a toast and a slice of bacon.  The bacon actually does feel better.

Tomorrow is GRASS day here in Canada.  Will be interesting to see what happens.  No, I'm not interested in it.  Never was.  Same with drinking - ha ha ha - same with meds - I just don't like that dizzy, spacey, loose feeling.  I don't like mood altering, mind altering or emotional altering.  And my joy with food / eating - I don't need to challenge that.  I'm glad I'm not drawn to it all. Guess I'm too old.