Dreams

I had a difficult night last night.  About 12am I woke with major pain in my left collarbone.  I could not rest.  Finally around 1am I got up, rubbed some cream on my collarbone and took and Advil.  It slowly eased and I got some sleep.  That chest pain continues to be an issue....

Early in the morning I got up, took Jax out, and everyone (pets) got a snack, back to bed.  I dreamt.  In the dream I was flying around a house/castle.  I realized it was my house and I was trying to get in  By flying I know.  I then realized I was flying and said I want to fly up to God, because I had started flying higher.  As soon as I said that, I started falling.  I yelled out why God, when I want to come to you, you let me fall..... please don't let this fall hurt  - as I was getting closer to the ground and preparing myself for a hard thud.  I gently landed.  I was glad about that.  And then I saw a box/cave and inside was a woman with blond long hair - she said You know what to do.  You need to go deep inside yourself for the answer.  Then I woke.

I know what that means.

Not surprisingly, I need to start being serious about meditating etc.  I have tried off and on over the years a bit.  I have always known I need to get into it.  And I've had fleeting thoughts on it the last few weeks.  I'm not really sure how to start.  Do I 'fast'? and meditate.  Do I lock myself in a room and ohm all day?  Does it involve vegan eating?    How should I do this?

Being very tired and emotional because of the Advil this morning, I decided to listen to a meditating CD and just lay there.  Did this after breakfast.  It's a start.

Then got up and went with AJ to Tim's for lunch and met Maureen and Mike.  Not exactly the vegan or fasting plan. 

I find it amusing that my safe pain (chest pain) is in my heart chakra.  It's not going to kill me, but man oh man it seriously hurts when I do something, and aches when I just sit here.  Laying down aches too.  I wonder if it has to do with the emptiness feeling.  Guess that answer is in the box/cave too.

Glad the weather is better - no snow today, actually melting a bit.  Hope it continues as I really don't want to make others shovel our driveway.  I got a few treats for the boy across the street, and got 2 little girl books and 2 little chocolate bears for the neighbour John.  He has his nieces come over and I figure they would like that better then me giving them something.  Besides I like the little tykes.  Don't see them that often.  They always apologize when the girls are over and they make noises outside.  I tell them it's ok, besides they aren't over that much anyways.  I know the books are girly but I have no idea what they would like.  Maybe in time I can find out and get closer to what they are interested in.

I came across a comic that I found amusing, but I can't copy / paste it.  If you are interested...  thin lines.  I thought it fit with my food/eating.  About sums it up!