Homework Again

I can't figure out if it's my homework that's getting me wiped and sleeping all day or if I'm seriously wiped out.  I've been sleeping most of the day Saturday.  I did get out a do a few wheel barrows of stones, (just 3) and tided up the patio a bit.  Between those I slept.

I did a bit of my homework too.  It's not really that new tho.

Back to the talk with Joan.

It was good, but really we basically just talked a bit on what she came up with.  A lot of it had to do with her sensing there's fear, lack of worth, not being enough, and protection.  It's deep.  I don't know if those all belong together or what.  I can see I have fear issues still - I just can't seem to get to the core of the fear/fears.  I don't know why.  It must be something that really still triggers me on it from that moment instead of seeing the fears from my now adult self knowing there's nothing to truly fear.  

Or is the fear something from outside the 'normal' realm..... and in the Spiritual / Energy realm?  That freaks me out!  

But I will continue to work at getting to the core of fear.

We talked about the pig which usually is about abundance etc - and I feel the opposite of that.

We talked about baby.  Yes, I had been pregnant and I still do think of my boy off and on thru life.

We talked about just general things on how I've been feeling.  Other then wiped / fatigued, I'm content emotionally.

My homework is to write down all my 'not enough' things, the belief system created, affirmation of I am lovable, valuable and perfect just as I am and also write about where I gave my power away.

The Not Enough list is easy to do.  The Belief System I can sorta get to, and the Power Away is so-so.  The Affirmation is interesting as I can repeat it until I'm blue in the face - it's the issue of believing it.

This is where my last minute wording add to my tattoo.  It's that I'm worth believing.  That I have worth.  That I can be believed.  And also it's worth believing in God/Divine Spirit with all one's heart.

I also thought and saw another tattoo last night when I woke and thought on things.  Just have to think on it some more.  Not going to rush out and do it at the moment either.

I've gotten some of the listing written down already.  I keep going back to what is the fear.  And I also wonder why I have value or worth.

Wish I could look at the end of the book for the answers.  Ha ha ha