So I'm guessing you want to kind of have an idea of what happened in the session with Joan. Well she called on time, and we talked. I had told her about the Forgotten issue, I told her about the other dream as I had only emailed her the first dream. Then I also talked about how I've been feeling down the last few weeks, I've been feeling like I can't be happy and that I feel I create myself as a victim.
She said that when she focused in on me that day, she got the sense that I needed to feel
joy. That followed basically along the line of my feelings of being down and being happy.
As we talked she suggested that we should do hypnosis but I had said originally that I just wanted to talk. I sensed we needed to do this, and told her I was already under. I can at this point relax fast enough to be in that state without having to wander around steps going down, relaxing, getting calmer, going deeper. It does help, but I can quickly get there too. At this point, since we had been talking, I didn't want to waste time doing a after hour relax. I don't think she wanted to either. She checked in with me a bit, and I kept saying I'm there. Think she realized it was ok. She asked me where these feelings came from and I wondered if it was from when I was younger although didn't think it was from this life. At first we had talked about when I was 5 yrs old and sis was born. She kept nudging me and said she thought it was earlier. Then she said from a past life.
I know past life is questionable. Is it real? Some people believe in it others do not. It's unknown to me. It bothers me just like other unanswered questions. Or things like those people who disappear, aliens, Atlantis ..... those types of things.
So just going on with the idea of past life and following that route......
She asked me how many lives ago I thought it was. I said five. Then she asked me when the original happened as she felt it was longer - she wanted to get the original point otherwise I'd just have to deal with this again. I saw the number 200. She said wow that was a long long time ago. (remember this is 200 LIFE TIMES ago, not years ago) As I had said that, I also saw a started to see. I saw a man with fur skin on sitting by a fire eating. He was eating something off of of ribs. She asked me where I was. I couldn't really tell. I knew there were others, but it was like they had their back to the person by the fire. And I knew I wasn't the person sitting by the fire. Was clear on that. I could see it was a cave, this was a tribe.
I started feeling sick. I was nauseous. I kept going around, and looking. I kept looking at the person and at the ribs. I looked again at the ribs. And I said to her, I think I am the ribs.
She asked me to go back earlier that day to see what led up to this. I took a breath and I saw me walking behind the man with the fur in the fields. I could see grass as we followed a trail. There were more of the tribe with us. I felt down. She asked why. I said that we had gone out to get and hunt food. I had done something so that the animal escaped. I didn't know what I had done to cause this but I knew it was my fault that we didn't get any food.
Joan started to explain that sometimes the animal hears something and gets away, or that the hunt is 'off'..... I said no, I did something so that we didn't get the animal. As I think of it now, I think that's weird, as at that point in history - food was life. Why on earth would someone purposely let food get away?
I flipped back to the cave/fire/eating. I realized after that they had killed me... and I was eaten.
Joan asked what else. I couldn't get any other information. She asked me to ask my higher guides to show me more information. I still couldn't get anything. She said that they were probably protecting me. I said I didn't understand, I want to know and how is this protecting me if I don't know. Basically we ended with me having to meditate and think and what had happened. She said that I would probably get more information in the days to come. And probably too in dreams.
I felt nauseous and down and wanting to cry after the session. Basically sat outside cried a bit and then decided to work in the garden. Afterwards I went and took a bath.
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