OA to Go

For those following, you know I've been to AA / OA.  I will always be grateful for what I learnt there, and for the time it helped me.  In a way I've never left it as I continue to follow a few groups on line.  I just can't seem to do it though.

I struggle with going to meetings in the evenings (night driving and fatigue), and my focus isn't on the meeting, it's on everything else.  AA has better recovery, I find, and the people are friendly up here where I now live, I just don't connect with them that well.  My real issue is the food, though I continue to stay away from alcohol.  The OA groups up here are in the evenings (dark driving again) and although friendly, not as connective as AA groups.  And not as well recovered either.  It's a hard addiction to recover from.  (Just saying from my own thoughts, every addiction has it's demons and recovery is difficult in them.  Between AA and OA  for me, AA was easier, food addiction is harder)

One on-line group I enjoy and actually read daily had a posting from an OA big book study share.  Big Book is the AA blue book.  Nothing new to me as I've read it numerous times.  But this study offered a different look.  That intrigued me.    OA Big Book Study

Allergy of the body and mental obsession.  That's what I'm in right now.  I try to stop the sugar and carbs and mentally I am drawn back in.  The writer in the study states 'I can't stop once I've started.  And I can't stop from starting again.'
It's like I want to crawl into the text and wrap it around me like an old, comfortable, supportive blanket as I read the words in it.  It's home words for me. These are my people that I understand better and want to talk with.  I am so glad the person posted at this time - I am ready for it, and I needed it.  Kuddos to them.  Not that they know I'm kuddoing them! ha ha

RH follows that line of AA /OA as I've stated before, so this will help too.  I don't really know what I'm going to do about meetings after I come back from RH.  There is a very close AA meeting I will be able to get to - even in the dark, but that's not where I can talk about food in.  I like the 'thumpers' of AA who know the Book and can get one thru it, the ones serious about recovery, and serious about the steps.  There were a few in my years ago AA meetings - those are the ones that I know helped me get the weight off.  I'm not going to say recovery because I realize now even though I knew the Big Book inside and out, I didn't have recovery because of the pills I took to lose the weight.  Somewhere in the back of my mind even then, I knew it wasn't the way to go.  Having AA sponsors for and OA addiction, they didn't ask or notice, and I didn't say.

OK, Spirit, you are going to need to look into this and let me clearly know what I'm going to do when I come home from RH!  In the meantime, I'm going to read that study and prepare mentally for the meetings at RH.

Now, for those who don't know - Asking Spirit works!!!!  Talia usually is stunned when I do it and then let her know what the answer is.  She's seen me get answers to things that she thought was semi-impossible.  I keep telling her, it's faith, trust, and belief.  Oh and willing to hear the answer - even if it's one you don't want to hear.

I started writing this post yesterday.  I didn't overly think on if Spirit was going to answer me, and I didn't have a time limit on it either - but during the evening I started realizing what I can do.  Dr Poon has a facebook - maybe, just maybe there will be a few Pooners around my area that we could get together.  I also know there is an AA meeting in the Cove here, which I will go to and ask if they will allow me to come.  I do qualify on the AA side, but I will be honest with the and let them know I am going for the food issues - not that I'm going to talk food, just that's the reason.  I would like to go until I either find a more compatible group (like the Pooner FB idea), or find going to this meeting compatible.  (meaning I can offer help there too, not just a one way street).  

I printed off that OA study and will study it in the meantime.  Another duck lined up for me!